I start and end my day with a prayer. This is how I win in my daily battle. I pray for my family, friends, good health, abundance, guidance, safety, wisdom, traffic, weather, my car’s condition and most specially the difficult people in my life. I know what you are saying… why pray or them who pour vinegar on your already bleeding wound. But believe me, I pray for my boss who is the most demanding, complicated, problematic and not easy to be around with person in the planet! Me, exaggerating?! Nah…. Of course not.
Let me give you an example to prove how unbelievably challenging it is to be with this person.
But first a short background...
I work overseas, when I first arrived in this new country I prayed to God to put me in a company where I can be productive, contribute my expertise and become the best that I can be while being compensated well. God answered all my prayers, however I forgot one thing – I did not ask Him to give me a kind and gentle boss (now this is why we have to be specific in our prayers!)
I am Asian, she is European – see how different our cultures are? The job interview went well (she is obviously impressed) but I knew from day one in the office that it is not going to be an easy ride. I knew because my new colleagues gave me this ‘HOW LONG WILL SHE STAY ’ look from the beginning since I am working very closely with the boss.
She is the real life Miranda (Meryl Streep’s character in the movie The Devil Wears Prada).
Now for that example/s…
The boss loves to scream. She’s in black everyday and had forgotten to smile. She is grouchy from the time her day starts making a big deal out of nothing like when a file is not opening quickly because she decided to be so impatient clicking on a folder 100 times causing her system to jam. What’s worst is that every time this happens (which is every day), she’ll make sure the whole office knows about it shouting her head out to have someone fix the mess.
Have you met somebody who at the sight of the tip of her nose will make you want to hide under the desk … this is the person. She takes pleasure in making people nervous and attacks her prey more seeing fear in your eyes.
And she’s a master at releasing stress. This is how she does it. She finds fault, use up her energy to look for a mistake, yells at the concerned (nobody is allowed to explain), dials your number and relay her version of the story, tell you how stupid (her favorite word) and how badly the person acted… a good 15 minutes (if you’re lucky). And by the way, you can hear her voice with the receiver 5 feet away from your ears. Oh and all this drama when you’re not even the least concerned about the issue. You’ll end up asking yourself… What am I suppose to do about it? Nothing, she just wants you to listen and get all stressed!
This was the scenario I had to live with until my contract expires. Am I still with the company? Yes… I survived and even renewed my contract for another term.
WHY? Because she changed, not yet totally (she’s a work in progress – lol!) but she’s a lot different now, calm and more in control of her emotions.
One day she was screaming so hard on the phone, screeching and cursing at something I have nothing to do and no control over, it was so obvious from my reply and sound of my voice that I’m fed up and tired of her unbelievable attitude. Two hours later when she calmed down, she apologized for her behavior.
HOW?
I am generally a ‘deadma’ (don't care) person. I work and deliver my job well – ‘Trabaho lang, walang personalan’ (just work, nothing personal) . While people around me wallow and become affected by the boss’ negative ways, I would silently say a small prayer for confidence, wisdom and protection. When I am about to loose my patience, I’d breath deeply and release the bad energy she’s bringing upon me. Every morning, she’s on my top 10 list of people to pray for. I ask God to make her calm and considerate so the day would turn out peaceful, this way I am not only helping her but more so myself because I don’t have to deal with a stressful day.
To quote Mr. Rick Warren in his article ‘Pray for Others’
The quickest way to change a relationship from bad to good is to start thanking God for people you are having difficulty getting along with.
Praying for them will do two things -- change your attitude and change them. Positive praying is much more powerful than positive thinking. People may resist our help, spurn our appeals, and reject our suggestions, but they are powerless against our prayers.
True enough, people are indeed powerless against our prayers. Jesus said, ‘…. If you have faith even as small as a mustard seed, you can move mountains….’ Nothing is bigger than our God. All we have to do is place our hope in Him.
Prayer is a free gift. Praying is entrusting ourselves and our circumstances to God hoping that through His mercy we are blessed. While we continue to pray for ourselves and our loved ones, let us not forget to include a short prayer for the difficult people in our lives, because by doing so we share the benefit of God’s gift of prayer to everyone – good or bad – even if they don’t know.
Pray. This is how to win everyday.
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